The most
amazing thing happened last weekend. I got to use my new fat separator to make
the gravy with our Sunday roast! For those of you who don’t know what this
ingenious gadget is, let me enlighten you.
When making
gravy using meat juices rather than Bisto you will inevitably get a layer of
fat on top of the gravy after it’s allowed to settle for a couple of minutes.
But, and here’s the kicker, when you pour the gravy onto your dinner you get
the oily bit too. Not tasty. But the spout on the fat separator jug takes
liquid from the bottom not the top meaning you pour only the gravy, leaving the
oil slick behind. How fabulous is that? I was so excited.
And then it
dawned on me. I was stuck in a bit of rut. Not the clothing rut of which I
wrote a couple of weeks ago (See Who's Up For Some Zhooshing?) but a gravy rut. I mean a
symbolic gravy rut not that I was drowning in actual gravy. That would indeed
be weird although potentially more exciting than the gravy separator story
itself. But stay with me.
You see my
life has been ticking along nicely, if you exclude the disappearing husband bit,
and I am now fairly content in my world. My routine varies little, as is the
nature of routine, and it works. During the week I do the school run, go to work,
take care of the house, another school run, supervise homework, make dinner, watch
TV with the kids, then pop them off to bed before tidying up, watching an
episode of White Collar on Netflix in my PJs then going to sleep myself.
Weekends are pretty similar but with the school runs swapped for party runs,
additional school uniform washing, a roast dinner and a few board games thrown
into the mix.
I like my
routine. I particularly like watching White Collar. If you appreciate an
intelligent, cultured man in a smart suit with an oh-so-fit body hidden beneath
and a smile that makes you go all wobbly inside then this is the show for you!
Oh, and it’s got a great storyline too.
There is absolutely
no need for the following photo but I’ve put it in regardless to make you
smile. Meet Neal Caffrey…
Anyway, as
pleasant as that diversion was, it was a diversion nonetheless! Let’s move on and
save the dashing Mr Caffrey for later.
My point is
that I’m doing the same old thing day in, day out. There’s nothing innately
wrong with that. As a survival technique, hanging on to a routine is superb. It
means the essentials get done and your brain doesn’t have to be bothered with
managing any new information in a time of crisis. It’s free to go into meltdown
while you process what may feel like the end of your world. The routine means
that you and the kids all make it through the day in one piece regardless of
whatever else is going on. But once you get past the disaster, or it starts to
diminish and takes up less of your thinking capacity, it’s time to start living
again.
That doesn’t
necessarily mean going back to do doing the things you used to love in your
spare time pre catastrophe. Maybe you’ve changed and don’t enjoy those things
anymore. Maybe you used to do them with your partner and you can’t imagine
doing them alone or with someone else. Or maybe you just feel you want to find
new experiences. Let me elaborate.
I recently
went on a hen weekend with a lovely friend and bride-to-be. After a fun filled
day of games and a night of food and drink we all crashed out at the hen’s
sister’s house. Unfortunately, travelling home on the Sunday morning was more
of a challenge than the previous day’s activities due to a vicious post hen
party hangover. If only I’d discovered Becks Blue earlier!
Anyway, in
the taxi back to the station I was staring out of the window and indulging in
one of my favourite pastimes – people watching. In all honesty, I was trying to
focus my eyes on anything that could take my mind off the nausea rising from
within. Anyway, I realized there was a city full of people going about their
day in completely different ways.
They weren’t
having a quiet Sunday morning lie in - they were out and about. Instead of
being at home doing the washing in their PJs they were wearing gym gear and
going for a run. Rather than each member of the household grabbing a slice of
toast as they pass through the kitchen, families were sitting chatting over
breakfast together in a trendy café. There were signs for foods I’d never heard
of let alone considered eating.
There were
families with rucksacks heading off to who knew where. I saw kids on scooters
and bicycles beside their parents, out for no reason other than that they
could. There were even adults on skateboards and roller blades. People were out
meeting friends – on a Sunday! That was unheard of when I was a kid. People
were going places to do things and I wanted to ask each and every one of them
what they had planned for the day. The city was buzzing with people doing all
sorts of diverse things.
They were
all doing life a different way. And they looked happy.
I made a
promise to myself that day which I’d totally forgotten about until the gravy
separator came into my life. I was going
to start doing life differently. I wasn’t going to move into a city or learn to
ride a unicycle but I was going to make some small changes in my little world.
So I’m going
to give it another go now and I want you to do it with me! Let’s see how we can
add a little pizzazz to our lives…
1. Do Something
New Each Day
Take an alternative route to work; walk the dog in a park you haven’t
been to before; choose a different sandwich flavour for lunch; stop in a café
for a quick coffee and a piece of cake; buy an unusual ingredient in the
supermarket with no idea of what you’re going to do with it; play TV channel
roulette and watch whatever it falls on for at least ten minutes… you get the
idea!
2. Pick A Hobby
Choose a hobby that you’d like to take up and give it a chance. Maybe
you’ve always fancied learning the piano, taking singing lessons, playing
tennis, trying ballroom dancing, running, drawing, knitting or whatever takes
your fancy. Find a club, a teacher, a book or a YouTube tutorial to get you
started.
3. Get The Kids
Involved
Introduce the kids to something new that you can all do together. Whether
it’s baking, board game challenges, ice skating, picnics in the park, driving
into the countryside to get deliberately lost and explore new places… basically
anything not related to housework or school that you can do as a family.
4. Accept An
Invitation You Wouldn’t Normally Accept
You know the one I mean. That coffee morning or drinks party you
“couldn’t make”? The invitation comes in and when you check your diary you’re
relieved to see a prior engagement. Never has a school parent evening or dental
visit looked so inviting. Well man up ladies! Say yes and go along. By all
means have an exit strategy of a later “appointment” or similar but give it a
go. At the very least you may get a tip on how someone else is doing life and
what you might want to absorb into yours.
5. “Things I’m
Going To Do” List
When you see or hear about something you think you’d like to do one day
don’t ignore it or put it on your wish list, put it on your “things I’m going
to do” list. Maybe it’s a play a friend’s been to see, a holiday destination you’ve
always planned to visit or an experience you’ve fancied undertaking but shied
away from like skydiving. If you want to do it you can, so put it on the list
and start to work your way through the entries rather than filing the scrap of
paper in a drawer.
So lovely people, let’s go forth into the world and do life differently.
There are so many things out there for us to enjoy and we don’t even know they
exist until we swap our PJs for some clean clothes, get out into the real world
and open our eyes! I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the number of
times you find yourself smiling along the way. I’d love to hear about what you
all get up to! Leave a note in the comments section below or email me at singleplusbaggage@gmail.com.
But while you’re making these little tweaks to your world, remember the
routine is there for a reason, for security and to make sure we get done what
we need to. So by all means discover and enjoy new things but… never neglect
your gravy and make sure you watch White Collar soon. You won’t regret it.
Enjoy!!!!
Love
SPB
xxx
Firstly, I need a gravy separator and I'm still to watch White Collar. Two things I can add to the list!
ReplyDeleteI have however joined a new weekly art class which I love and I'm now engaging with other fellow wedding photographers for regular coffee mornings. Something I'm really not comfortable with but is actually very beneficial. So I very much agree with you SPB small changes to our routine and ones that take you out of your comfort zone, can make a huge difference to our lives xx
Well done on getting out there Clare! And good luck with the gravy! Love SPB xxx
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